Monday, March 28, 2016


这个部落格 都被我遗忘了。
两三年前好像起了另一个,也没去打理。





Tuesday, September 10, 2013

A year and half later!

Hi all,

I have not been updating here for so long! Now I am a home maker! Serving my husband and waiting upon God's call to the ministry after my 3 month mission program!

My friendship with Jesus is making a change. Somehow! I becoming more independent and learning to take the bible as it is and trust God is who He say He is in the bible!

Interesting, as an old Christian, suddenly I dunno why I doing what I am doing now! Then I read the new believer booklet, the very 1st page - the goals! Ya, what is my goal and what am I aiming for in this race?

Then . Found the answer, our very 1st purpose as Christian is to become like Jesus! He died on the cross for our sins and we are to repent and be changed to be like Him!
Secondly it is serving Him as a missionary, teacher, pastor or etc!

Then how can we be changed and become more like Jesus?

It is to be His student and learn from Him! The bible says we are the disciple of Jesus if we follow Him!

What is the requirement for following Jesus?

When we enroll into a school to be a student, there are prices we need to pay and commitments required! So being a student of Jesus, is entering into a school of learning in God s kingdom! There is a price yo he pay! The price is deny yourself, take up your cross daily and follow Him!

Have you been doing all these?

Thursday, March 17, 2011

God s presence becomes so real to me!

Two days ago, on the tuesday, i stayed home for the whole day. The 118 shop computer not working and i could not do any work. I have workers' annual tax to study on how to submit.

Somehow my dropbox was messed up by me and i could not really understand the tax submission procedures. I was frustrating and get angry with myself for being so stupid and slow in understanding. I was really wondering why i could not understand things at a faster speed like others. Well, i am just not like them. So this is me! The inability to do my job well made me mentally disturbed. I did not want to rely on J for small and big things. I really wish i can do things without have to call him to have the confidence to carry out the task.  He is just too poor thing to have to listen to me nagging abt my unhapiness towards the job and had him settle for me for anything i had not done well.

Well, at night after dinner, i was feeling hopeless and depressed. The world seemed coming to an end for me. I can imgine how can i be happy for the rest of my life. However, i remembered God had not forsaken me before. I felt a raising faith from my heart to believe Him even in darkest moment.

Yesterday, i went to GMB meeting. When steve on the song, this is the air i breath, i began to feel the hunger for His presence and i felt God in the room. I began to cry and the fire of God burnt in my diaphram. I felt the contraction and pain. I know God is cleansing me and purifying me with His fire.

I cired, laughed and cried to the Heavenly Father as i felt that i was not loved by my own earthly Father. Then i heard God saying that He is the one created me and i belonged to Him. My earthly Father is just somebody that God put Him as my father. However, i know that i supposed to love him still. God desires me to forgave and honour my earthly father. But i should know that my Heavnly Father loves me more and that He is the one truely loves me deeply. He sent His one and only son to die on the cross for me. Thank you my heavenly Father for the revelation. This revelation woke me up from my sorrow. Of course, when i cried, i laughed again, the laughter was from God the healing stream of joy.

I sat up on my chair as i felt better. After awhile, i began to cry again as i saw my own earthly Fatehr's face and reminded that he did not want to buy me presence of gold for my marriage. Then God told me that :"you will see how i am gonna bless you"  "since your earthly father is not gonna bless you" I began to laugh as i heard that. A gush of joy ran into my heart. I was happy and felt the peace and love from my heavenly Father.

From there on i stayed in the presence of God and at one time i think God is speaking about the wind of the Holy Spirit. As i see ACTS in my mind and felt that the Holy Spirit, a current run through my mind and body. I know that is from God as i experience that before.

Well, maybe the wind of God is coming like the acts. What we are experiecing at GMB meeting is really kidergarden level. There are primary, secndary, jc and uni level. God show us more.

Well, on the tuesday God spoke to me through the mp3 bible i had downloaded free from internet. It is about the story of the blind man who called out to Jesus" Jesus, son of David, have mercy on me." Jesus heard him and asked him, " what do you want from me?" He gave an exact answer. Well, many of the times God wants us to be clear with what we exactly want and asked for it. For me, i would like to ask that J and i love God wiht all our heart, mind, soul and all our strenghth." and well now i would said that i can blessed many many ppl and gave glory unto Him.

Another story God spoke to me to encourage me is when Jesus was sleeping and the wond started to roar at sea. The disciples began to afraid and woke up JESUS. Jesus asked why are they so faithless. Immediately i felt God is encouraging me to believe Him although the situation at work place seemed like the roaring wind of the sea but as i trust in Him, the wind will ceased.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

The Holy Trinity

Today, amazingly God spoke on the topic of the Holy Trinity through Pastor Steve. This question i raised on the Friday meeting at dote's house. However, i have no idea after me or before me another three person also raised such a question.

So it is obvious that God wants to reveal Himself through this topic.

The Holy Trinity, Godhead, is the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit.

We focus mainly on the Father today. There are seven points about Him.

1.Holiness (Matt 5: 47-48), if we wanna be holy we must identify ourself with the Father.

2. Grace (Matt 5:13-16)

3. Provisions (Matt 6: 25-27)

4. Knowledge (Matt 6:31-33)

5. Destiny (Matt 15:12-13)

6.Judgement (Matt 18:34-35)

7. He is the source of the Holy Spirit (Luke 11:12-13)

When we go to the Father like a child with our emotions, He comes quickly to attend to us becaue He is a loving Father and He cares so much for us that when we are hurt and cried out to Him, He comes so fast to love us and assure us.

God knows every hair on our head. Even when one of our hair fall, he knows which the number to that hair. He is just so powerful that He counts our hair. When we have problems or difficulties, He knows them too and every situation. We just need to focus on Him, pray and trust that He has a will for everything. He will help us:)

Thank you my Father in heaven for the breakthrough tonight. Treasure the presence of God. Be in Him 24 hours a day. Let not other things easily distract us.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Jesus answered my prayer by waking me up!

For the 1st time i can wake up so early at 06:55am.

Last night i decided to not set my alarm as it actually made me went back to sleep after it rang instead. Paul always shared with us how God woke me up. I had not really experience sth dramatic but sudden woking up only. So i prayed and wanted God to do a miracle to woke me up with a condition that this doing will really wake me up.

Early in the morning, i heard my mum calling out "xueping, xueping" but there ws no respnds. Then she called my mum, i answered her. She asked me to open the door for her for she had locked herself outside and forgot her key. She could not cycle to work.

I get up and open the door for her. Asking her to tell me where she place her key so that i can just bring her the key and she need not come in. But she do not know where she placed it. While i walked towards my room and intended to go back to sleep again as the sky is not bright day yet. I wonder what time is it. I went back my room and looked at my hp and it is 6:55am. I thought to myself that it is still early, i can go back to sleep.

It is at this moment that a voice came out of my heart. And He said:" Didn't you ask for God to wake you up at a time He wants?"

Then i was fully waken upon hearing this. My heart was excited as God really answered my prayer and my mum's loud voice of calling out is 90% effective to made me awake and with the voice to remind me of what i prayed, i am now sitting on the chair and writing this testimony to God.

Well, now it is up to me to decide if i will obey God to be awake at this hour or to satisfy my flesh desire to go back and sleep again.

God i choose to be awake and do your will today. I believe that you wake me up at this hosur for a reason as i allowed you to decide for me.

Taiwan Trip (22nd to 27th Feb'11)

My conclusion is i should not go overseas with anyone else but J unless the Lord gives me breakthrough. Otherwise even the mission trip i should not consider.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Is it against God to go into relationship/marriage with non-christians?

Definitely i will said yes, it is not God's will for any of us to go into non-christian relationship.

In the old testament, Solomon's kingdom was being divided because he loved many foreign wife. These wives turned his heart to worship foreign gods and build their temples. He was not devoted to God like his father David.

Because of these, God gave his kingdom into the hands of Jeroboam ten tribes except the tribe of Judah, remained royal on the reign of his son, Rehoboam.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Your presence in my life is so important, God!

This morning rushed to work without reading my bible. But i did my quiet time today. When i was brushing my teeth i ask for His presence, even when i am in the train. He showed himself in gentle way. I could feel His presence like a thin blanket surrounded me. Yeah, praise God for being so gracious. I indeed need His strength and wisdom to do my payroll today. And i need Him everyday to have peace of mind and joyful heart.

While i was doing my payroll, i remained in His presence. My mind engaged the Holy Spirit and conversed with Him on what i am doing. In such way, He guided me in my work and i had no much stress in finishing it. My heart is filled with joy too. Praise Him. These are His credits.

I am just thankful to God that J is with me today. He is God sent everyday. Feeling awkward with the other boss, he was there and sent me to bedok, and the boss did not raise his voice at me again. Yeah, victory!

Wondering what should i write in this blog!

A bad day but had the presence of God at GMB agin, thankful!

Who else on earth can be so dumb like me? Somethimes i feel so frustrated with myself yet He still loves me so much.

This is the day without entering His presence. It is disasterious. I dun like it God. My mind was in confusion and disturbed mentally.

Yesterday was a day of total peace and victory. Praise you God!

In good and bad times i still give you praise because you are worthy and your ways are perfect. There are times when we will face a lot of difficulties and God seemed to not drawing close to us, it does not mean that He had abandon us and dun care about us. He is allowing us to be stretched so that we can go further and develop faith, perserverance.

James1:2-4
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perserverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

I could feel God's fire around me now as i read His words and yield to the Holy Ghost. God thank you for your presence. Let me know you more and glorify your name. I want to stay in your presence everyday coze i cannot run my own life and i need you so much to run my life. I seriously needed you.  Sav me everyday, Jesus!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Psalm 18

Today is valentine's day. I spent awhile reading this psalm. The surprising thing is that this psalm speaks of God in the temple and the cherubim. why am i so surprised?

On the sunday i went to meeting at the shelter service. This is the 1st time i went and God touched me by allowing and gave me a chance to repent of the sins which entangled me for years since i was a child. He had taken it from me that night. Thank you Jesus for such a breakthrough. I know i still ahve to work hard on it by draw close to Him daily. This sermon, steve talks on isaiah's supernatual encounter with God. He was before God and He saw God seating on the throne with 4 cherubims. That when Isaiah was there, God moved His body forward. He shared that we are the only thing on earth that caused the Almighty to move. How He really loves us!

Most of the time, if i see the same thing or same word appeared more than one time, God is speaking to me. This is our way of communication.

In paslm 18:6-7. God was angry when David was being oppresssed by his enemy.

" In my distress i called to the Lord, i cried to my God for help. From His temple he heard my voice, my cry came before Him, into His ears. The earth trembled and quaked, and the foundations of the mountains shook."


I knew that in the past i cried out to God a lot because of work difficulties etc and He would show up each time faithfully. He cares for me so much that as i cried out to Him there is not a single time He hind himself. His gentle presence would envelop me or the Holy Spirit will touch my heart and helped me to release the hurt  so that He could heal it and put in joy again;) So sweet and warm of His heart.

For His every touch is the reflection of His goodness and unconditional love. How can itake His love for granted, and  take Him lightly after all He had done for me?


I enjoyed the valentine with God's presence with me. Also with my husband -to - be, Johnny!

Saturday, February 12, 2011

The double portion of Elisha

Today i want to give thanks to God for waking me up at 0550 am. I was in the midst of a dream. The dream was bad and i think is demonic. i dreamt of the one of the coffee shop stall tenant. He is wicked in the dream. I thank God that i was waken up when my mother was cooking at the kitchen. When i was awake i knew it was the Holy Spirit who woke me up. Otherwise i would have a very disturbed and sad day because of the dream.

Many a time, the dream i have will affect my whole day. So if i dreamt of God it will be a happy, warm feeling hanging around me and the same goes to bad dream days.

Before the service started, i quarrelled with My fiance over a issue happened two days ago about whether his mother overheard our conversation, because i was complaining about her being nagging and making me vomit blood. It sounds really bad to angry with such things but it is really irritateds at times. So during worship i could not concentrate and was distracted. The pastor as usual gave alter call but i did not go up. So i stayed at the back. I could not connect with God. Many others are being touched by God, laughing, crying and praying in the Spirit. I was alone and bitter still at heart. I told God i wished i can experience Him but i cannot let go of the hurts myself. I was thinking also, if i go would God really touch me with my angers not settled?

Soon He answered my question and assured me. At some point, i saw my pastor was walking to the wrong direction, by the way, he is blind, so i quickly went over to wanting to pull him out to clear his path. Instead of me leading him out, he initiated to pray for and i was wondering how to answer him. Before i could reject him, he lay his hand me and prayed for me.

This is his prayer: " Lord, i pray that you will use her in her work place and to bring many to Christ." When i heard it, teh chooi lan, one of the coffee shop worker came to my mind. This morning i was just thinking of her and sympathise with her for her divorce and her health problem. My heart was sad for her and i started to cry. This cry was from deep inside my heart, i know i could nv really love her so much to wail for her situation. It is the work of the Holy Spirit. I felt the double portion of Elisha anoiting of God fell on me and i fell to the ground hard. I had nv feel so real of God s power so strong to make me fall down so quickly in 1 second. Usually my leg feel wobbly and when the fire of God burnt in my belly, i would be on the floor. As it will be painful and there will be a  pull on me to the ground. So i slowly lowered down to be on the ground by that pulling force.

I cried for a while and laughed also. This time it is only for a while but yet the power was there. God's power in Our metings together is getting stronger and stronger. Lord, let the revival come. Empower me with your Holy Spirit so that i could bring ppl to Christ at the coffee shop. This is my prayer.

这个部落格 都被我遗忘了。 两三年前好像起了另一个,也没去打理。